Potential New Chipotle Slogans

January 19, 2016

After negative publicity from recent foodborne illness outbreaks, Chipotle is trying hard to win back customers.  What they need is a snappy new slogan.  Here are some suggestions.

  • Make a Run for the Crapper.
  • Statistically Speaking, It’s Safer to Eat Here Than to Be Married to O.J. Simpson.
  • If We Couldn’t Be Trusted, Would We Have All This Cool Modern Art on the Walls?
  • Save Money.  Poop Better.
  • Remember, Vomiting Helps You Lose Weight.
  • You’re Drunk.  We’re Open.  BOOM!
  • People Come Up with Great Ideas on the Toilet.
  • We do the Norovirus Right.
  • Our Tables are Slightly Less Sticky than Taco Bell’s.
  • The Guacamole is Extra . . . But the E. Coli is Free!
  • There’s No Cleanse Like a Chipotle Cleanse.