January 11, 2016
Did you watch the Golden Globes last night? Me either, but I had a good excuse. Here they are, the top reasons for Not watching the Golden Globes:
- I’m tired of seeing Matt Damon get honored for having to be rescued from stuff.
- I get unnerved by how much of the screen Quentin Tarantino’s head takes up.
- Steve Harvey told you me it was on tonight.
- I’m still upset they snubbed “Mortdecai”.
- Cops cut off the electricity to my Oregon bird sanctuary.
- I hocked my TV to buy Powerball tickets.
- My New Year’s resolution was to not waste time watching rich people you don’t know congratulate themselves.